Why our stories are so important

Have you ever heard it said to someone, or perhaps had it said to you, that you should write a book...? Some people's lives seem to have been so rich with extraordinary events and experiences that they should be written down and immortalised to entertain or educate the rest of the world.

In fact, we all have extraordinary stories, and we can all learn from each other. Richard Wilkins from the Ministry of Inspiration, says that we are all superheroes masquerading as ordinary people. I love that! And it's true. I have the incredible privilege of hearing people's stories in my coaching practice, and also on "Whatever Next...?" days which I co-facilitate with my colleague, Jeremy Clare. Everyone's story is so interesting and so amazing, and so unique and diverse. What is also fascinating to observe is that there are common threads running through these stories, which could broadly be called 'the human experience'. Not so much threads of events, but threads of emotion. We are all students of the same school of life, each attending our own individual lessons. The learning is the same, but how we each came to that learning will be different every time. And sometimes we have to repeat the lesson over and over before the teaching sets in! Sound familiar...?!

Our stories are our foundation, how we became who we are today and how we will become who we have yet to be. They form us, and can in turn INform us. If you follow your own story, you will discover where you learnt to respond to certain situations, good or bad, and also how to adjust that learning, looking at a particular experience with new eyes - perhaps with the help of someone else's eyes. You will also be reminded of times in your life when you enjoyed a certain activity or hobby, but as your life moved on, these things were forgotten. These memories, chapters in our story, can be the key to returning to Self, and often trigger new ideas and opportunities when re-evaluating your life after a significant life change.

When you hear someone else's story, you might find yourself thinking, I know how that feels! This is one of the ways we connect as human beings, and how we learn to understand each other. This is one of the reasons I decided to include group workshops in my new coaching programme, The Whole Works, because in conjunction with 1-1 coaching, group workshops provide that extra and very different stimulus to reflect and learn.

I decided to write my own story in 2 parts, which can be read on my website. It was a hugely cathartic thing to do and helped me to see where I had learnt certain things along the way. Whether it takes you 5 minutes or 5 hours to write your story, I'd highly recommend it.

Get Busy Living - The Power of Hope

It is such a glorious day today, one of those clear blue sky days when you can't help but feel uplifted, when hints of Spring and warmer weather are everywhere. In the same way that a dull rainy day can bring you down and everything takes that little bit of extra effort, the healing warmth of the sun makes anything feel possible. Hope springs! With very little attention, you can feel that actual physical flutter of excitement inside - or is that just me...?

Where would we be without Hope? We need Hope to keep us going through the wintry days of the year, and of Life. The promise that things will get better, that bright days and new adventures lie ahead. A message to anyone who has just had news of redundancy - don't despair! It may feel like the end of the world now, but this is an opportunity for something new and hopefully the best thing that's ever happened to you.

One of my favourite films was screened (again!) on TV this week - Shawshank Redemption - and I couldn't resist watching it. Despite the awful violent episodes in the film, Shawshank Redemption is ultimately about Hope, and about Love. At the end of the film, when Morgan Freeman's character, Red, is sitting on a bus on his journey south to meet up with his friend, he reflects:

"I find I'm so excited I can barely sit still or hold a thought in my head. I think it's the excitement only a free man can feel. A free man at the start of a long journey whose conclusion is uncertain."

Red had Hope because on the 'outside' he had a friend, he had someone who loved him, and he had Hope of happiness, something to live for, even though he didn't know what the future held.

If you feel that your future is uncertain, remember that uncertainty isn't all negative. It just means that you don't know what it looks like yet. If you need some help working out how you want it to look, I can help you. Have a look at my website and give me a call if you're ready to 'get busy living'!

www.springtolife.co.uk

My family and other animals

I mentioned in a previous blog that it was my dad's birthday, and yesterday we marked the 2 year anniversary of his passing. 2 years ago, after the trauma of saying goodbye, we went en masse as a family for a walk, followed by a Sunday lunch of bangers and mash, the perfect meal in my dad's eyes!

Yesterday we repeated what is becoming a family tradition - Growler's Day (Growler being the name given to my dad by the children). I come from a large family, and our gathering included 12 adults, 10 children and 9 dogs! The sun broke through as we stood around a woodland pond in Chipperfield, in Hertfordshire, trying to avoid the dogs as they leapt out of the water and shook themselves dry.

I'm immensely proud of being part of such a large family, who regularly gather for Sunday lunches - although not always en masse. I'm also particulary proud of the way my parents have always welcomed and embraced additions to the family group. And I'm not just talking about partners. Two of our party yesterday are not relations, but treated as part of the 'pack' naturally and without question. One is an 18 year old lad called Billy, who adopted my parents when he lived next door as a young boy. His family eventually moved to Spain and he would always spend part of his holidays staying with my mum and dad. Now, he has returned to Britain to attend university and most weekends he stays with my mum. He helped my sister move house, is always offering lifts and collections and helps my mum with a variety of tasks - including educating her on how to use the internet! (This was a bit of a shock for my 15 year old nephew when he posted a video on Facebook one night after some late night sledging in an old bath, which included some rather blue language from him, and he immediately received a message from his grandmother! )

The other addition is a friend of my sister who is staying with my mum at the moment. She's always been a true friend to my sister and having her around seems perfectly natural, and an opportunity to offer her a helping hand during a time of change.

Individually, we are from a mix of moulds, but together we are one big family. In fact, the truth is, I'm an interloper myself. Because of my background, the assertion that blood is thicker than water doesn't work for me. We may not be able to choose our relatives, but we can choose who is family to us, and yesterday I was with mine, and it was great!