Spring to Life Musings

The Optimist's Creed

2011-01-20T02:48:00.003-08:00

Some people believe that being depressed is a choice. I'm not going to go into the difference between clinical depression, general unhappiness and all the gradients in between, but what we do know is that our mind is capable of far more than we give it credit for, and it can at one time destroy us and at another be our saviour.

If you have a tendency to fall into depression - whether that is a lack of self belief, negative self judgement, blame, low confidence, etc, on those days it is likely that you will achieve little and feel worse by the end of the day.

Rather than focusing on the fact that days of depression stalk us, what if we were to focus on the fact that on other days we feel optimistic...? Stalked by optimism! If you could store all those feelings of optimism in a powerful symbolic weapon - like a Star Wars lightsaber - which could destroy any feelings of negativity at one stroke, wouldn't that be a wonderful thing?! You could keep it under your pillow and grab it on the mornings when depression and negativity had got past your defences during the night, and obliterate them in one swipe!

This is how many people use mantras and affirmations. Below is The Optimist's Creed, from the book The Secret. You could do worse than start the day reciting this, or even some of it. Why not try it out? You don't have to be depressed to use an affirmation, just determined to fill your mind with thoughts that serve you rather than those that will do you no good at all. My boyfriend reads a mantra every morning, and frequently shares it with customers at The Drawingroom. You can find his 'lightsaber' on The Drawingroom website.

The Optimist’s Creed by Christian D. Larson

I promise myself

To be so strong that nothing can disturb my peace of mind.

To talk health, happiness, and prosperity to every person I meet.

To make all my friends feel that there is something worthwhile in them.

To look at the sunny side of everything and make my optimism come true.

To think only of the best, to work only for the best and to expect only the best.

To be just as enthusiastic about the success of others as I am about my own.

To forget the mistakes of the past and press on to the greater achievements of the future.

To wear a cheerful expression at all times and give a smile to every living creature I meet.

To give so much time to improving myself that I have no time to criticize others.

To be too large for worry, too noble for anger, too strong for fear, and too happy to permit the presence of trouble.

To think well of myself and to proclaim this fact to the world, not in loud words, but in great deeds.

To live in the faith that the whole world is on my side, so long as I am true to the best that is in me.

Have an amazing day!

Martin Luther King Day - What is YOUR dream?

2011-01-17T02:34:00.000-08:00

Today is Martin Luther King Day. When I was at university, we celebrated Martin Luther King Day, commemorating a man whose passion and determination continues to inspire people the world over.

Mr King fought and died for freedom and a 'colour blind' society. He is best known for his 'I Have a Dream' speech, words which were to inspire not just the world as it was then, but as yet unborn generations.

Along with Nelson Mandela and Mahatma Gandhi, whose teachings he followed, Martin Luther King never gave up on his dream, however impossible it must have seemed at times, and whatever risks were involved.

On this day, of all days, ask yourself, "What is MY dream?" And if you find yourself thinking that dreams don't come true, that perhaps you don't believe you're capable of making it happen, remember Martin Luther King, Nelson Mandela, Mahatma Gandhi, and others, who never gave up, and step by step, took action to build, inspire and motivate thousands until their dream became a reality.

Want to start working on your dream? Come to my Going for Gold Goal Setting Workshop on Friday 28th January, 10.00-12.00, in Aylesbury, cost only £35. Email me for full details: amydeane@springtolife.co.uk

Judge not... we all make mistakes

2010-03-26T09:55:00.001-07:00

It's so tempting isn't it? To take the high ground when someone does or says something wrong. In fact, we do it without thinking. We make a judgement. We stand aloof and virtuous, pointing our finger at the 'bad person' - the one who has fallen from grace. How do you feel in that moment? Outraged? Superior? Justified? Smug? A little bit of all of the above...? Be honest!

And I bet whilst your judgements are running through your head, you're thinking, "I would never do a thing like that!" That's surely the implication anyway. Ask yourself the Byron Katie question: "Is that true? Is it really true?" In their shoes are you absolutely sure you wouldn't have done or said the same thing? At the very least, you might have considered it.

We ALL make mistakes, we are all human, and humans are the most fallible creatures on the planet. Perfect? Not me!

Forgiveness and compassion are far worthier responses, and I'm sure they carry better karma.

Think twice before you cast that disapproving glance or share the news of someone's misfortune.

Judge not... it could be you next time.

What is the best PACE for your business right now?

2010-02-15T09:36:00.000-08:00

I was talking to a friend the other day about a spontaneous conversation he had had with a friend recovering from an operation who was struggling to walk. As they made slow progress to their destination, they distracted themselves by discussing the variety of words to describe different types of walking. It occurred to me that this is a great way of examining the PACE at which we are actively working on our business, depending on the circumstances, and how we might identify when we are not moving at the right PACE to achieve our goals.

How are you working? - be honest!

DAWDLE, AMBLE, SHUFFLE
If you feel this is the PACE at which you are working on growing your business, you may want to challenge yourself and pick your feet up a bit! None of these suggest direction, motivation or most importantly, ACTION! At this rate it will be the end of the decade before you get there, by which time you will have lost momentum.

RAMBLE, SCUTTLE, LURCH
If you identify with any of these descriptions, you are probably trying out lots of different ideas, but not necessarily focusing on exactly where you want to end up. Bernadette Doyle calls this 'spray and pray' marketing - a little bit of everything and hope for the best!

TRUDGE, TRAIPSE, TODDLE
This suggests that you lack enthusiasm for all the effort you are making, and certainly lacks energy and confidence. If this is the category you have put yourself in, I suggest you come up with some new ideas, get some advice, or choose another vocation.

STROLL, STRIDE, JOG
Now we're getting somewhere! You may not have quite the velocity you need, but at least you know where you're going!

MARCH, SPRINT, GALLOP
Here we go! Now you know exactly where you're heading, you're building up speed, and you're heading for your target! This suggests you have definite direction and the confidence and enthusiasm you need to get there.

STRUT, SWAGGER, PARADE
So, you've arrived! You've focused on your goal, worked hard and smart, and can now relax for a while and enjoy your much deserved success! You can slow down to a SAUNTER whilst you contemplate your achievements and plan the next project.

So what PACE are you working at, and if you recognise that you're not moving effectively, what can you do to address that?

What's LOVE got to do with it?

2010-02-14T09:34:00.000-08:00

Today is the one day of the year dedicated to LOVE. A shame really that it is commercially hijacked for the sole focus of romantic Love, when in fact we could be taking the opportunity to celebrate LOVE in all its various forms.

It's not common to use the concept of LOVE in business, and those professionals who are courageous enough, stand out from the crowd. One of the things which impressed me most about Nigel Temple when I saw him present for the first time, was the fact that not only did he use a visualisation technique to get everyone to look into the future and where they wanted to take their business, but that he also highlighted LOVE as a key element to successful networking. Not, of course, the romantic kind, but the kind which applies generosity - the passing on of contacts and word of mouth referral.

In the celebrated book, The Greatest Salesman in the World, Og Mandino suggests the use of LOVE to disarm an awkward customer, or influence an otherwise resistant potential client. My partner often tells the story of arriving for a third meeting with a potential client, who had previously cancelled meetings while he was waiting in reception or dismissed him after 5 minutes. This time round, having been reading Og Mandino's book, he decided to apply the teachings of the second scroll, which recommended looking at the person in question and silently saying "I love you." Sounds kind of weird, doesn't it...?! Nevermind that, it worked! The demeanor of the client immediately changed, and they ended up doing a great deal of business together.

LOVE does in fact permeate and influence every area of our lives, and where there is no LOVE, there will be uncertainty and maybe even disarray. I was asked to produce a poem about LOVE for a dinner party last night, the eve of St Valentine's Day. Here is my contribution:

What’s LOVE got to do with it?

Poets write about it,
Singers sing about it.
What is this thing called LOVE?

Hearts melt over it,
The same hearts break over it.
Where is it, heavens above?

It’s the LOVE of friends,
When their best friend mends
From an illness or that broken heart.

It’s the family who are there
To show that they care
When your world has fallen apart.

It’s the delight of a child
And their heart-melting smiles
To show that they’re happy to see you.

It’s the joy that you feel
From a home-cooked meal,
A walk in the hills, or a sea view.

It’s that wonderful greeting,
To show they’ve been waiting,
From your dog as you walk through the door.

It’s all of these things
Of which singers sing,
These, and so much more.

It’s the thing that sustains all life on earth
And feeds us body and soul.
You can’t buy it, copy it or get one better,
But it’s LOVE that makes us whole.

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!

New Year - You Choose

2010-01-07T09:46:00.000-08:00

A new year presents a time to make changes, make a decision, choose a new path. It's the beginning of a new cycle, a fresh start, a time to set goals and make choices about our lives. It's a very empowering time.

So, have you set your goals? Do you know what you want to have achieved by the end of 2010? Whatever your individual goals, here are some thoughts for the beginning of the year:

1. Greet each day with Love in your heart, as The Drawingroom Mantra says. And be gentle with everyone you meet, whoever they are and whatever they do. You never know what challenges they are facing.

2. Clear a space for new things. Physical clutter which preys on your mind, can also create blocks in your life. Shred your old bills, move the furniture, pass on clothes you never wear and get rid of things you never use (anyone want a bread machine...?). During a stagnant time in my life, I moved the sofa and 2 weeks later I was in Malawi in East Africa, counting hippos... but that's another story...

3. Do something you've never done before. Learn a new skill, discover a new passion, re-kindle an old one, book that creative workshop, take a train to somewhere you've never been, go dancing!

4. Stick to your Values. No-one can take away from you the core of who you truly are. Work out what this is and what's important to you and live your life by it.

5. Be authentic. If you are always yourself, you will never have to put on an act or try to remember how to behave. You will feel confident, and people will have confidence in you.

6. Take time to be. Whether you use meditation, yoga, thai chi, Qi Gong, or just go for a walk, still, reflective time is where we find peace and relaxation, which is essential for our health and well being. It can also allow creative thoughts to flow without the interruption of busyness.

7. Don't wait for perfection. If you always wait for the perfect time, the right amount of adjustments, the right feeling, you will never get anywhere. Perfection can be the enemy. Just do it!

8. Face your fears and take a risk. If you're avoiding doing something because you're afraid, of failing, of being disappointed, of rejection, you will never move forward, never know until you try. What's the worst that could happen, really...?

9. Take responsibility. My wise and wonderful friend, Psychologist, Gill Garratt of Happy Talking, once said to me "The only person responsible for your Happiness, is you." Only you can choose how you respond to your life, events, situations and challenges. Once we embrace this, we can stop getting stuck in blame and start reclaiming control of our lives. This is equally true of our feeling of responsibility towards the Happiness of others. Do your best by everyone, the rest is up to them.

10. Look after your health. Only you can take steps to heal your aches and pains, and explore the reasons for the inconsistencies in your health and well being. Conventional medicine isn't always the answer. For a bountiful resource of alternative health practitioners and healers in the Chesham area, see The Healing Tree Network.

This year is yours to do with what you will, as is the next 24 hours, tomorrow, and next week. It is your life. You choose.

Group Coaching in Marlow and Chesham

2009-12-16T08:34:00.000-08:00

Running your own business is a challenge, especially if you are a sole trader. This is why many people choose to use a Coach to help them stay focused and motivated.

1-1 Coaching is highly effective, but I realise that some people are afraid to take that leap of investment before they can see what tangible results they will get for their money.

So, I’ve come up with a solution!
I will be running Group Coaching Sessions in Marlow and Chesham throughout 2010 to really help you get the MAJOR BREAKTHROUGH you’ve been looking for and turn your PASSION INTO PROFIT!

• Kick-start the year fully focused on what you want to achieve in your business, creating a 360 degree vision of where you’re heading and how you’re going to get there.
• Professional facilitation to keep you and the group focused on your goals.
• Ongoing support and encouragement.
• Motivation and inspiration.
• Ideas generation and brainstorming with input from fellow members.
• Facing challenges knowing that you’re not on your own.
• Commitment and accountability.
• Raised energy and confidence.
• Learn what works well and not so well.
• Your own personal growth and that of your business.
• Increased business profile.
• Increased profit.

Details for the Marlow Group:
When: Every 2nd and 4th Monday of the month, 10.00 – 11.30 am – that’s a 3 hour commitment each month.
Where: GT offices at 44-46 Chapel Street in Marlow (Please use public parking to avoid congesting the GT car park.)
Cost: £15 per session – with a maximum of 20 sessions throughout the year. We will take a break during the summer holidays.

SPACES ARE LIMITED! For these sessions to have maximum effect and benefit for everyone, there are only 10 places and only 3 PLACES REMAINING for the MARLOW GROUP so please contact me ASAP if you want to take advantage of this priceless investment.

Details for the Chesham Group:
When: Every 1st and 3rd Wednesday of the month, 10.00 - 11.30 - a 3 hour commitment each month.
Where: The Drawingroom, Francis Yard, High Street, Chesham.
Cost: £15 per session - with a maximum of 20 sessions throughout the year. We will take a break during the summer holidays.

Again, SPACES ARE LIMITED! 10 places only - contact me ASAP to get your name on the list.

MONEY MATTERS AND COMMITMENT
This is not something to dip in and out of, it is an investment in your business for 2010. Accepting unavoidable absence, I really need your 100% commitment – that’s 100% commitment to getting that MAJOR BREAKTHROUGH in your business in 2010. I have been coaching for nearly 10 years, and I know from experience that payment in advance helps clients to stay focused and TURN UP! That’s turning up to concentrate and focus on achieving your targets for growing your business.

If you would like to get the finances out of the way, and feel that solid dedication and pledge to upping your game, you can pay the full £300 for the year in advance. I fully appreciate that this won’t suit everyone, and I want to encourage people to do this, so you can pay in smaller chunks, ideally 4 sessions in advance, and if absolutely necessary, the minimum being monthly at £30 for 2 sessions.

If you want to make 2010 your BEST YEAR YET, sign up asap.

I’m really excited about these groups! MY passion is working with small businesses and watching them grow and soar, personally and professionally. It’s a privilege, and a truly inspiring and worthwhile investment of my time.

Amy
07989 440972
amydeane@springtolife.co.uk

ANNOUNCEMENT: Live Talk on Letting Go

2009-11-18T10:01:00.000-08:00

Following recent explorations, conversations and presentations to various audiences about how to apply The Law of Attraction, I have noticed that many people are unsuccessful because there is something holding them back, getting in the way of achieving their dreams.

Whatever the details, the essential element is a fear of something intangible, but it still manages to get in the way.

Tomorrow evening, 19th November, I will be holding a talk on Letting Go of What's Holding You Back, where we will explore and clarify exactly what your obstacles are and ways of removing them so that you can SPRING TO LIFE! and be a magnet to your dreams.

Feedback from the last talk:
"Thank you for welcoming us into you your home/shop/café/live venue! It was a great evening with plenty of food for thought. Your sense of calm, balance and wonderful poise was very warming and your words thought provoking.

It was very lovely to be amongst like minded people and to listen to their experiences & ideas. What a quiet but powerful unit even those people create!"

There are only 3 places remaining. If you would like to book one of these, email me, or call The Drawingroom tomorrow on 01494 791691.

Details of the event:
Time: 7.30 - 9.30 pm
Location: The Drawingroom, Chesham
Cost: £15

Sharing your secrets and letting go

2009-09-22T08:08:00.000-07:00

It was my birthday recently, and one of the fabulous presents I received (thank you again, Jess and Dom), was one of Frank Warren's PostSecret books. What an incredibly fascinating, inspiring and thoughtful project! I am completely in awe of what is becoming a phenomenon and a movement. Frank Warren, not an artist, nor a Psychologist, started the PostSecret experiment in November 2004 and he now receives around 200 postcards a day. This is how it works: You write your secret - something you've never confessed to anyone, on a postcard, with as few words as possible, and using the postcard as your canvas, so making it artistic and creative, adding pictures etc. You then post it to Frank Warren. That's it.

The diversity of revelations is as fascinating as the common threads of human experience, obsession and vulnerability. Page after page you find yourself laughing out loud, gasping in horror, gaping open-mouthed at the words in front of you, feeling the prick of unshed tears of empathy and sympathy - and more. It's like reading a creative representation of the history of the human experience and condition. Am I intriguing you yet..?

And there's more to it than that. As you read each postcard, you realise that behind each secret there lies a story. These few words are like the title of a book, the first spoken lines of a film, no fluffing around with setting the scene, but right in there at the deep end, delving into the deepest recesses of what really matters. It's so utterly human, I don't think I've ever come across anything so incredibly powerful, and it's all expressed with such simplicity. Frank Warren is a genius!

Not only that, but he has created the most amazing gift - the chance to confess with complete anonymity, the opportunity to let go of fear. Within the book there are various messages from participants, revealing what changed for them as a result of sharing their secret; a decision to change; the courage to share their secret with someone significant; for one girl, a marriage proposal!

I am truly inspired, in case you hadn't noticed! In the "Whatever Next...?" days I facilitate with Jeremy Clare, people share some of their story, whatever is relevant to the explorations of their "Whatever Next...?" questions, and each day is inspiring and a privilege to be a part of. Having read the PostSecret book, I have started formulating an idea for a workshop, giving people the opportunity to share, explore and let go of their fears, and perhaps create a postcard to contribute to Frank Warren's ever-growing post-bag. I'd love to receive your comments about this idea.

To find out more about PostSecret, go to the blog. And if you like postcards, have a look at Postcard Jim's blog, created by a very talented and immensely creative friend of mine.

The Law of Attraction

2009-08-19T03:56:00.000-07:00

Have you heard of The Law of Attraction? Do you believe in it, or do you think it's a load of rubbish? I mean, how can it possibly be true that all you have to do is 'ask' and you can achieve anything - recovery from illness, new relationship, financial security, the house of your dreams... the list, of course is endless.

I grant you, it is hard to believe, but the evidence is that it works. People who know what they want and believe they can achieve it, are always heading in the direction of their dreams - and they have also, consciously, or unconsiously, 'asked' the Universe for help.

'The Secret', book and video, published in 2006, isn't the first documented evidence of The Law of Attraction, but it has introduced the idea to many more people with a strong marketing campaign and powerful word of mouth response. I highly recommend a look at both the book and DVD and encourage anyone to test its claims. A simple way of doing this, is asking for parking spaces... on your way to a meeting or the supermarket, 'ask' for a parking space in a spot convenient to your plans, and imagine parking your car with ease. I swear it works every time for me!

I recently tested The Law of Attraction on something much bigger. You can read about this in my July Newsletter, and get some additional tips and links on how to apply The Law of Attraction, and useful websites. I had such a brilliant reponse to this newsletter, that I have collated and published some of them in a separate email, with permission from contributors.

Even if you're sceptical, you have nothing to lose in trying it out, and everything to gain by giving it a go.

Happy manifesting!

Getting Motivated

2009-07-07T08:55:00.000-07:00

You'd have to be superhuman to feel motivated every moment of every day, and if you're running your own business or life has just dealt you a challenge, maintaining a high level of motivation is a challenge in itself. I find there are two ways to get an injection of motivation - listening to someone whose energy is high and has great ideas, and motivating others myself.

Recently, I dialed in to a teleseminar by Bernadette Doyle, marketing guru and coach. Bernadette is very inspirational, even though you know she is selling a product whilst passing on tips and advice. At the end of the call, I felt really fired up with ideas and motivated to raise the bar in my own business.

However, I get an even greater boost of motivation when I'm presenting to an audience or working one to one with clients. Last week, I facilitated and presented a "Whatever Next...?" style workshop at the Gerrards Cross Springboard, an invaluable facility for people who have been made redundant, run by dedicated volunteers every Monday evening. After a frustrating day working at my desk, I got a huge boost from standing up and motivating an audience, and receiving the positive feedback at the end of the evening. I get the same burst of energy when I've been working one to one with a client, who has arrived uncertain and directionless, and leaves buzzing with ideas and enthusiasm. I feel as much gratitude to them as they do to me. What a great job!

So, if you're struggling with your motivation, go and find someone who you know will re-energise you and vice versa, whether it's a friend or a motivational video on-line. Or give me a call and book a coaching session, and I promise to get you back on track and buzzing!

Inspiring confidence

2009-06-22T07:01:00.000-07:00

A lot of people who seek out my services are looking to increase their confidence, for all sorts of reasons and in many different areas. Some people see themselves as generally lacking in confidence; some have low self-esteem and low self-belief; others need to raise their confidence in a specific area of their life, perhaps within a relationship, at work, or for a particular event.

We are all confident about something, whether it's a belief, the way we raise our children, political allegiance (well, maybe not so much these days...), whether we like chocolate, or maybe just being confident that we're not confident. The trick is to understand this and transfer this confidence to the area which needs it. Lack of confidence is just an illusion created by fear, more often than not unfounded fear.

One area where people frequently lack confidence is in public speaking, presenting to an audience. I managed to raise my confidence in this area through being a member of The Athena Network, being in a situation where I had to stand up and talk about my business, and then going on to present on different topics. In fact, I can now confidently say that I really enjoy it. When I went on a workshop with Partners With You, and watched Neil Roberts strutt his stuff, I wanted to be up front, not in the audience.

Many people choose Toastmasters to learn how to perform infront of a crowd and get used to writing presentations. I also heard last week of an apparently fantastic Platform Presentation Skills course by Christopher Howard - certainly a considerable financial investment, but also an investment for your business.

But if you want inspiration to raise your confidence, see that anything is possible, look at these 2 videos:

If they can do it, you can.

A celebration and a lesson in honesty

2009-06-15T07:36:00.000-07:00

Sometimes, the simplest of things can teach you a great and memorable lesson in life, without pain or strife. The other day, I witnessed this unfolding for an 18/19 year old lad at The Drawingroom. It was early evening, and he was sitting outside waiting to have a coffee with a friend, when he heard something drop to the floor when someone walked by. He didn't pay attention immediately, but when he looked up, he saw a bundle of money on the ground. Picking it up, he found that it amounted to about £350, and when his friend returned, they decided to hand it in to The Drawingroom in the hope that the owner would enquire inside when he came back to look for it.

I happened to be there and had noticed someone I know walk past a few minutes earlier, and when I then saw him striding urgently back through the cobbled courtyard, I realised the money must belong to him. He was over the moon that someone had not only found it, but hadn't decided to pocket it. He had actually seen the young lad counting the money with his friend and didn't know how he was going to approach them. He thanked the boy and handed him a £20 note from the bundle of money.

It was a really great feeling to witness this event. We were so relieved that the money had been dropped outside The Drawingroom, and not on the High Street, where it is far more likely to have disappeared into someone's pocket. Richard, my partner, and owner of The Drawingroom, was proud that his two young customers had been so honest, and also rewarded them with free coffees. When they left, our young hero said that it had been a life-changing event for him, that he had learnt that honesty has its own reward and he felt a little taller for it.

The Power of Community

2009-05-25T08:00:00.000-07:00

I first learnt about the concept of 'community' when I was working with The Good Brand Works, now Goodbrand & Co, an innovative Corporate Social Responsibilty consultancy. The company's working practice was based on 8 specific values and the importance of working as a community of like-minded, committed individuals. Once a month, we would gather for a 'Community Day', where we would reaffirm our passion for our work, and check in with our shared values to ensure we were honouring the principle of working internally and externally within this framework. It was an inspiring time of my life, I had never felt so excited about a job, knowing that I wasn't just earning a living, I was making a difference, whilst at the same time feeling respected, valued and supported as an individual. The community's commitment to our values is still a strong reference point for me, especially when I'm working with clients on exploring and identifying their own core values.

Community will mean something different to everyone, and more often than not, we are part of more than one. A community will give you support, belonging, identity, sometimes a shared identity. I have several different communities in my life. Family, neighbours, The Drawingroom in Chesham, my business network, online networking communities, fellow coaches, the broader community of the town where I have lived most of my life, and I know I could think of others. This morning, I had a fascinating conversation at The Drawingroom with two guys who were meeting face to face for the first time, but who were part of an online community of like-minded souls who had developed a bond of friendship through discussions on subjects close to their hearts. They were off to London to meet the other members of this select group, all of whom would be meeting face to face for the first time. I was quite excited for them! Just from the conversations we had in half an hour, I could tell they were going to have a great time.

I feel very proud of all the communities in my life, and very strengthened by them. Even as I speak, my next-door neighbour on one side is cutting the grass in the garden of my neighbours on the other side. They have moved and are waiting for a new tenant to move in. There is no personal gain in what he is doing, he is just being community-minded. Good karma points! Our front gardens cross into each other, so there is no boundary, and whenever either one of us cuts the grass at the front (usually my neighbour!), we naturally go straight across and cut both sides. This doesn't happen further down the road. Small patches of grass are left overgrown whilst the adjacent patch is trimmed neatly down a measured line between the terraced houses. Not very community-minded, no good karma points for them!

Community is very important for our sense of well being. It is the antidote to lonelines and isolation. I met a girl last week who has moved 47 times in her life and one of the things that she is searching for, yearns for even, is being part of a community. A sense of belonging. This is something my boyfriend would identify with, because his father was in the army and consequently spent his formative years moving from one place to another with little time to feel that deeper sense of belonging. He has now completely turned that around by creating a community space within our town where people can meet for coffee, feel safe, welcomed and known, gather with friends for meals and to listen to live music, and also be a peaceful haven for quiet reflection. It's a wonderful unique place, The Drawingroom, and the heart of it, the essence of the vision, is to contribute to the local community.

I have learnt to appreciate being part of a town community, having at one time wanted to leave it all behind and settle elsewhere. Apart from 4 years at university and a couple of years in Yorkshire, I've lived here since I was 10 years old. Both my fathers grew up here, (for an explanation of this, read my story on my website!), and every now and then I meet someone who grew up with them. I met one such person the other day whilst out walking my dog. He pointed to a tree, which I had previously photographed, which they used to call Old Man's Foot. There is something very comforting about knowing that I'm walking along the same paths which my dads walked and cycled on years ago.

I was delighted to hear that Radio 2 has been running a campaign this week called 'Love Where You Live', which culminates today in street parties being held around the country. There is even one in Leicester Square right now, with live music.

I could write about Community for ages, and tell stories of community spirit. You may have heard on the radio this week about the chaos caused by the fire in Chesham, which gutted the British Legion, a sad loss for part of our community who met there. I've heard that since the fire, they have had offers of help from various local organisations.

I'd love to hear what community means to you. It is something to be celebrated. Leave a comment with your story! Let me know that you've visited! Then I'll know that Spring to Life Musings has a community of its own!

Don't be a bully

2009-05-14T16:15:00.000-07:00

Last weekend, we celebrated my mum's 70th birthday. Some family friends offered their lovely home as the venue and 30-40 of us gathered on Sunday afternoon in the Spring sunshine. It was a really fabulous day with close family and special friends, with a surprise visit from one of my mum's 'adopted' children from Scotland as an additional treat.

As I surveyed the scene, small groups greeting each other with hugs, catching up on news, sharing a joke, another glass of Pimms, I noticed that one of my young nieces, who is usually full of energy and enthusiasm, seemed rather subdued. She was keeping herself away from the other kids, not smiling much and there was none of her usual banter and well, loudness! Eventually, her mum discovered that she was suffering from a rough time being bullied at a party the day before. She had been physically pushed around, and called names which shouldn't come out of a child's mouth. As we were at a house she didn't know well, with some other kids around she doesn't see very often, she had decided to keep a low profile so that she didn't suffer the same abuse of the day before. How heartbreaking! She did seem to perk up after her mum had assured her that she was surrounded by people who loved her and could relax and enjoy herself, but she had spent most of the day already hiding away.

I hope she manages to give the lovely, safe, fun day on Sunday a higher profile in her memory bank than her experience the day before. Often, this sort of negative experience can cause automatic responses when children find themselves in a similar situation, and can sometimes become a habit which goes into adulthood - in this case, being subdued at large gatherings in unfamiliar places.

In her book 'The Journey for Kids', Brandon Bays describes many case studies where children have adopted a behaviour pattern as a result of one seemingly insignificant event. For example, she discovered that a child who was being labelled a 'loner' at school, was in fact, removing himself from large groups because it 'reminded' him of the feeling of being scared at a fireworks display, and being told he should enjoy himself. Brandon Bays has her own process for helping children and adults to adjust the way they feel about these types of memories, which in turn de-activates the automatic response. The important thing is to replace all negative feelings of anxiety, fear, insecurity, for example, with those of happiness, security and confidence. We can't change the past, but we can change how we feel about it.

It just goes to show how important it is to observe what our children are experiencing and making sure we are not dismissive, when something could become a significant event in their lives. The same goes for flippant remarks, like "Don't be a wimp", which I've heard delivered to the same child more than once in the past. It can take only one remark like this for it to become a truth in the child's subconscious: "I'm a wimp." Reassurance is far more effective.

Positively good news

2009-05-06T08:09:00.000-07:00

Have you noticed how some of the most fascinating conversations and discussions can occur spontaneously, leaving you feeling grateful for having been in that place at that time, and not rushing off to 'get things done'...? I've had loads of great, inspirational and motivational conversations like this and sometimes make myself just stop and be, enjoy the moment and see what happens.

I had one such conversation at the weekend, sitting in my garden eating a deliciously full fat brunch with my boyfriend. We started chatting to a neighbour over the fence, philosophising about the emotional connection to physical well being and good health,(nothing to do with full fat brunches!) and moving on to the general impact of positivity on the health of the nation, in fact, the world. Which led us to the media... and the dangerous influence they have over our lives.

I really do believe that our current recessionary times are made far far worse by the constant bombardment of the latest bad news about our economy, how much longer it will last than everyone thinks, how we are all doomed. And what effect does this have? However upbeat people may have felt when they got up in the morning, seeing the sun shining, the start of a brand new day, by the time they've sat on a train, in a car, read the latest news or heard it on the radio, they will arrive at their place of work feeling thoroughly miserable and thinking how they must cancel their plans for lunch because it's too much of a risk to spend the money or venture into the community outside, when by all accounts, if the recession doesn't get you, swine fever will.

I'm not suggesting the media should simply stop reporting on world events, but can't we add a bit more 'however...' to these stories? I wonder how a social study would look if everyone had the choice of picking up either the Positive News, or the Negative News. Same stories, different approach. I guarantee we would start seeing signs of 'recovery' far sooner if more people reached for the Positive News. More money in circulation, rather than beind hidden under the mattress (because it's not safe in the bank, we all know that..!); more innovative businesses being created as a result of redundancy; more investment; more smiling faces; more happiness!! And isn't that what we're here for..? To be HAPPY?!

So come on, you journos, editors of media - take responsibility for the part you are playing in this. There is more at stake here than the downfall of a political leader or party, it's the health of the nation, and in more ways than one!

And as for the rest of us - hesitate as you watch the tv, listen to the radio, or read the newspaper... Hold a little of your acceptance back, receive the news with a questioning mind: I hear this, and I wonder what else is behind this snapshot of a story; this information is not the whole of my reality; I will leave the house with a determination to contribute to raising the positivity in the world around me; I will smile at the first person I see; I will smile at everyone! I will help others to look for solutions instead of focusing on problems and I will actively look for things to feel good about...

If you're interested in this subject, I found some interesting articles at Helium.com

What is it that you're not noticing...?

2009-04-29T10:44:00.000-07:00

Our mind is an incredible piece of equipment. As we go through the day, it gathers information without us even realising it. I saw a film on the television the other day, when someone had to try to remember something. I can't remember the name of the film (although the information is in there somewhere!), but it was one of those save the world situations where a bomb had to be disabled and in order to recall the correct number sequence our hero had to use all his powers of concentration to search his memory. He brought the 'picture' to mind and the world was saved for another day.

I had a similar, if not so dramatic experience yesterday. I had decided to send out an e-letter to a select number of contacts I had picked up at the One Life Live exhibition. The content was directed specifically at this group, but I hadn't realised that I'd made a mistake when creating the bespoke recipient list, and it ended up going out to the whole of my mailing list. So, apologies to anyone who wondered why they were receiving it! Interestingly, the first people to respond didn't seem to notice or mind, but as soon as I received their emails I realised what had happened. As my stomach lurched with the realisation, a picture flashed into my mind of the bespoke list, with the box beside it stating the number of contacts. Had I registered this at the time, I would have been alerted to the fact that the list was too long, but whilst my subconscious mind had received and stored the information, my conscious mind had dismissed it.

What strikes me most about this, is that we are far more capable and extraordinary than we think we are. We can do and achieve almost anything we want if we put our minds to it, even overcoming what we see as our physical limitations. If we don't know it now, we can learn it; if we're not fit enough, we can train for it; if we don't have enough funds, we can find a way to earn them. So, what is it that you're not doing because you have decided you 'can't'? Try replacing this belief with something motivating like "I want to do this. How can I achieve it?" Don't let some silly thing like your conscious mind put you off - reach into your subconscious and explore the very real possibilities.

www.springtolife.co.uk

New entrepreneurs of the recession

2009-04-23T10:56:00.000-07:00

Being made redundant will mean something different to everyone, from your worst nightmare to something you've always dreamed of. For those who have been hanging in there, hoping to be let go so that they can start on the project they've had simmering away for months now, it's a chance to get cracking, hopefully with the cushion of funding to tide them over. To others, it can feel like the end of the world and they will be plunged into insecurity, financially and personally. It hardly needs saying that we are living through challenging times, and the media ensures we are all existing on the edge of fear, if we are not already consumed by it.

Whichever way you look at it, we all need to be more creative - about how we spend our money, what we do to enjoy ourselves (and that doesn't have to involve spending) and how we earn a living. The greatest entrepreneurs in the world are, without exception, creative in their approach to business, building and developing new and innovative companies offering something different and exciting. It is my belief that there will be many new entrepreneurs born of this recession. They don't all have to become new giants of the commercial world - you don't need to be quoted alongside Richard Branson to be an entrepreneur. The definition of the term from its French root, is 'one who undertakes'. To me, this means someone who is prepared to take a leap, be different, have faith in their dreams.

So, if you find yourself 'redundant', remember that it is not you who is 'redundant', but the job, and you are so much more than your job. And if you are the director of a company which is having to let people go, consider how you can help them to discover the entrepreneur lurking inside. In my next month's newsletter, I will be giving advice on what to do with your Great Ideas and who can help. To sign up to receive this newsletter, visit my website or email me direct at amydeane@springtolife.co.uk.

Why our stories are so important

2009-04-06T18:50:00.000-07:00

Have you ever heard it said to someone, or perhaps had it said to you, that you should write a book...? Some people's lives seem to have been so rich with extraordinary events and experiences that they should be written down and immortalised to entertain or educate the rest of the world.

In fact, we all have extraordinary stories, and we can all learn from each other. Richard Wilkins from the Ministry of Inspiration, says that we are all superheroes masquerading as ordinary people. I love that! And it's true. I have the incredible privilege of hearing people's stories in my coaching practice, and also on "Whatever Next...?" days which I co-facilitate with my colleague, Jeremy Clare. Everyone's story is so interesting and so amazing, and so unique and diverse. What is also fascinating to observe is that there are common threads running through these stories, which could broadly be called 'the human experience'. Not so much threads of events, but threads of emotion. We are all students of the same school of life, each attending our own individual lessons. The learning is the same, but how we each came to that learning will be different every time. And sometimes we have to repeat the lesson over and over before the teaching sets in! Sound familiar...?!

Our stories are our foundation, how we became who we are today and how we will become who we have yet to be. They form us, and can in turn INform us. If you follow your own story, you will discover where you learnt to respond to certain situations, good or bad, and also how to adjust that learning, looking at a particular experience with new eyes - perhaps with the help of someone else's eyes. You will also be reminded of times in your life when you enjoyed a certain activity or hobby, but as your life moved on, these things were forgotten. These memories, chapters in our story, can be the key to returning to Self, and often trigger new ideas and opportunities when re-evaluating your life after a significant life change.

When you hear someone else's story, you might find yourself thinking, I know how that feels! This is one of the ways we connect as human beings, and how we learn to understand each other. This is one of the reasons I decided to include group workshops in my new coaching programme, The Whole Works, because in conjunction with 1-1 coaching, group workshops provide that extra and very different stimulus to reflect and learn.

I decided to write my own story in 2 parts, which can be read on my website. It was a hugely cathartic thing to do and helped me to see where I had learnt certain things along the way. Whether it takes you 5 minutes or 5 hours to write your story, I'd highly recommend it.

Get Busy Living - The Power of Hope

2009-03-06T07:28:00.000-08:00

It is such a glorious day today, one of those clear blue sky days when you can't help but feel uplifted, when hints of Spring and warmer weather are everywhere. In the same way that a dull rainy day can bring you down and everything takes that little bit of extra effort, the healing warmth of the sun makes anything feel possible. Hope springs! With very little attention, you can feel that actual physical flutter of excitement inside - or is that just me...?

Where would we be without Hope? We need Hope to keep us going through the wintry days of the year, and of Life. The promise that things will get better, that bright days and new adventures lie ahead. A message to anyone who has just had news of redundancy - don't despair! It may feel like the end of the world now, but this is an opportunity for something new and hopefully the best thing that's ever happened to you.

One of my favourite films was screened (again!) on TV this week - Shawshank Redemption - and I couldn't resist watching it. Despite the awful violent episodes in the film, Shawshank Redemption is ultimately about Hope, and about Love. At the end of the film, when Morgan Freeman's character, Red, is sitting on a bus on his journey south to meet up with his friend, he reflects:

"I find I'm so excited I can barely sit still or hold a thought in my head. I think it's the excitement only a free man can feel. A free man at the start of a long journey whose conclusion is uncertain."

Red had Hope because on the 'outside' he had a friend, he had someone who loved him, and he had Hope of happiness, something to live for, even though he didn't know what the future held.

If you feel that your future is uncertain, remember that uncertainty isn't all negative. It just means that you don't know what it looks like yet. If you need some help working out how you want it to look, I can help you. Have a look at my website and give me a call if you're ready to 'get busy living'!

www.springtolife.co.uk

My family and other animals

2009-03-02T03:05:00.000-08:00

I mentioned in a previous blog that it was my dad's birthday, and yesterday we marked the 2 year anniversary of his passing. 2 years ago, after the trauma of saying goodbye, we went en masse as a family for a walk, followed by a Sunday lunch of bangers and mash, the perfect meal in my dad's eyes!

Yesterday we repeated what is becoming a family tradition - Growler's Day (Growler being the name given to my dad by the children). I come from a large family, and our gathering included 12 adults, 10 children and 9 dogs! The sun broke through as we stood around a woodland pond in Chipperfield, in Hertfordshire, trying to avoid the dogs as they leapt out of the water and shook themselves dry.

I'm immensely proud of being part of such a large family, who regularly gather for Sunday lunches - although not always en masse. I'm also particulary proud of the way my parents have always welcomed and embraced additions to the family group. And I'm not just talking about partners. Two of our party yesterday are not relations, but treated as part of the 'pack' naturally and without question. One is an 18 year old lad called Billy, who adopted my parents when he lived next door as a young boy. His family eventually moved to Spain and he would always spend part of his holidays staying with my mum and dad. Now, he has returned to Britain to attend university and most weekends he stays with my mum. He helped my sister move house, is always offering lifts and collections and helps my mum with a variety of tasks - including educating her on how to use the internet! (This was a bit of a shock for my 15 year old nephew when he posted a video on Facebook one night after some late night sledging in an old bath, which included some rather blue language from him, and he immediately received a message from his grandmother! )

The other addition is a friend of my sister who is staying with my mum at the moment. She's always been a true friend to my sister and having her around seems perfectly natural, and an opportunity to offer her a helping hand during a time of change.

Individually, we are from a mix of moulds, but together we are one big family. In fact, the truth is, I'm an interloper myself. Because of my background, the assertion that blood is thicker than water doesn't work for me. We may not be able to choose our relatives, but we can choose who is family to us, and yesterday I was with mine, and it was great!

Your World, My World

2009-02-02T10:49:00.000-08:00

One of the things that I love about snowy days is that they reveal some of Nature’s secrets, things that as human beings, our senses aren’t sophisticated enough to notice. When I first looked out of the window this morning, I could see where my neighbour had crossed the road to his van when he left for work this morning, and where a cat had wandered through a gap in the fence.

When I take my dog for a walk, she ‘sees’ all these things. Her world is rich with information about who has passed by, where they stopped and how long ago they were there. She can smell these things, whereas I am only aware of them when it has snowed, and even then, only when the snow is fresh and there are few enough footprints for me to identify cat from dog, child from adult. As Taya steps out of the front door and raises her nose in the air, the picture she sees, or senses, is full of the busyness of life, rich with colour and shapes, like a picture in a Richard Scarry book. This is her world, mine is far simpler in comparison.

It is important to remember to respect that we all have different views of the world. What is significant to me may hold very little import to someone else, and likewise, something they feel strongly about may pass me by.

I attended a workshop with Byron Katie at the weekend and in the process she calls The Work, she highlights how, just because we think one thing, doesn’t mean someone else will think it too. If we judge someone we care about for something they have done, or the way they have behaved, it doesn’t mean they are wrong, it just means that it is wrong in our world. The way Byron Katie tests this is by asking the question “Is that true?” – consider before responding, “..or is that your opinion?”

The next time you tie yourself up in knots whilst judging someone else’s behaviour, stop and think for a while and ask yourself whether it is possible that in their world they have done absolutely nothing wrong and don’t realise the way you feel, it could spare you a great deal of heartache.

Life of Rowley

2009-01-18T14:41:00.000-08:00

My neighbour’s cat Rowley died today.

Rowley spent his life trying to get people to slow down. He would saunter across our road, forcing the speed addicts to put their foot on the brake, then he’d roll over in the middle of the road so they would have to stop for a while – until Rowley decided it was time to move. He didn’t exactly stop lines of traffic, his was a limited sphere of influence, but even on the day he died, I saw two young guys stop, wait, marvel at this cool cat, and slow their own pace for a few minutes. Some time today it seems that he may have miscalculated and someone didn’t slow down in time. More fool them.

When not being the cat traffic light, Rowley would flirt with passersby, compelling them to stop and stroke the fluffy, purring ball. I’m sure I’ve read somewhere that cat owners have lower blood pressure – the petting of their cat after a stressful day’s work, reminding them that Love makes the world go round, not money.

Rowley will be much missed, not least by his family, but also by his neighbours: by me, who used to find him sleeping on my bed, by my dog, Taya, who was desperate to play with him – but Rowley was way too cool for that – by Bella, the toddler who he would run to greet, and by those regular drivers who will forget why they always slow down past his house. Rowley put the 'cat' into 'cool'.

Everyone leaves an impression on the world. Take a leaf out of Rowley’s book – slow down a bit, before it’s too late.

For Jade, Jason, and young Osker who is tonight experiencing his first of loss.

Trigger Happy

2008-11-25T02:53:00.000-08:00

As we go through life storing experiences in the vast library of our mind, each of these memories is allocated a 'key word', a trigger which will recall each specific experience when the key word is replicated at a later date. There will be several of these triggers attached to each event, and the more significant the event, the more triggers it is likely to have.

Of course, we are human beings, not computers, so our triggers will relate to all our senses - a certain smell, a sound, a song, the physical feel of something, the way someone behaves towards you, a view, a picture. The more subtle senses have stronger recall. At The Drawingroom, people daily remark on how the smell of the burning chiminea sends them back to a pleasant memory.

One of the strongest smells which triggers memory recall for me is creosote - my Dad painting the fence when I was a child - and the hypnotic smell of jasmin reminds me of a happy time spent in Italy. However, I also feel a lurch in my stomach when I hear certain songs from my teenage years, memories of a broken heart, or a seriously embarrassing event!

Recall isn't always positive, and can severely affect our development and even choices we make. Certain situations can send us reeling into a negative emotional state and we find ourselves becoming that child again, or back to a time as an adult when we weren't feeling as strong as we do today. Our bodies respond immediately, creating all the chemicals which make up the poisonous potion often causing a feeling of nausea, rejection, confusion.

Someone in authority saying you can't do something might induce a feeling of frustration, anger, resistance, and at the time you don't know why, you just react accordingly. People who were bullied at school can have very strong reactions to being spoken to in certain ways, and cannot handle what is meant to be friendly mickey-taking. For recovering addicts, certain situations will induce a craving for their particular addiction. How does a recovering drug addict cope with the need for an injection - holiday vaccinations for example?

If our mind is a series of connections, these connections can be rewired. This doesn't require surgery! Cognitive Behavioural Therapy is one technique, NLP another, and hypnotherapy can help shift the pattern of deeper phobias and impulses.

So if you find yourself reacting negatively and self-destructively when certain situations arise, do something about it. You can change the pattern. You wouldn't avoid fixing or replacing the computer, but you can't go out and buy a new mind.

Relaxation for creativity and healing

2008-11-14T04:53:00.000-08:00

It sounds like a paradox, doesn't it? That relaxation can induce creativity, which sounds like an activity, and healing, which gives a sense of resting and recuperating. But it certainly does do both. In our busy lives, filling each moment with the activity of a human doing rather than a human being, we often don't reward ourselves with time for stopping, relaxing, that it is a luxury for holidays, or for people who can afford it. Not so, relaxation is essential.

When we have moments of creativity, Eureka Moments, as discovered by Archemides, they are invariably when our minds are relaxed, maybe walking in the countryside, lying in the bath, or just about to drift off to sleep. I used to keep a pad and a voice recorder beside my bed for these moments, when my mind had dismissed the day's To Do List and was enjoying a flurry of creative thoughts.

I had a creative flurry whilst out walking my dog in the rain yesterday, coming up with a title for a Coaching Programme I'm currently developing, and an article I want to write, enjoying the play on words as I kicked through the autumn leaves, watching Taya bounding about between the trees.

There are two people in my life who inspire these moments of relaxation. Emma Lane, a very powerful healer whose strapline is "Relaxation is a vital ingredient to health and well being," and Patrick Lucocq, a clinical hypnotherapist, who runs a Eureka Moment workshop.

Emma now resides in Devon, lucky girl. She is by far the most powerful healer I've ever met and is also a lovley person to know. If you're interested in her work, visit her website at www.emma-lane.co.uk.

I went to one of Patrick's workshops at The Drawingroom this week and had a really wonderful night's sleep. He will be running 2 more workshops there this year on 3rd and 10th December. Patrick's website is www.calmhorizon.co.uk.

Enjoy your weekend, find time to relax, let your mind go, your body will be grateful and you might come up with the next big idea for Dragon's Den!

Mourning Has Broken

2008-11-04T04:30:00.000-08:00

Today is my Dad's birthday. He died in February last year and I can't believe so much time has passed since the last time I saw him. If you've visited my website, http://www.springtolife.co.uk/, and have read some of my story, this may be confusing. This is my second Dad I refer to, my Godfather, whose family my brother and I went to live with after our parents died in a car accident when I was 10 years old.

When I realised it was his birthday today, I was surprised at how quickly I felt the emotion of losing and missing him. He was my Rock, a larger than life character who always made an impressive impact on the people he met. He always knew what was going on in the lives of his 5 children and their families and I miss the security of his protective presence, his great bear hugs, and even his grumpiness! (He was known as Growler to his grandchildren!) Tomorrow we will contribute the loudest rocket we can find to the firework display at his local pub, as he always did.

In the same year, we also lost both of my elderly grandmothers, so it was a tough year. Losing elderly grandparents, who have perhaps become tired of living and who have lived long lives, is a different grief to suddenly and unexpectedly losing someone younger. However, I am enormously grateful for all the Love I will always have in my heart from my Dad, and also that he didn't suffer a long illness, that he left as the larger than life character that everyone knew and loved him for.

Grief has been one of the biggest challenges in my life, as I explain in the two parts of my story on my website. Sometimes it can seem like a snake bite which just adds a little more poison to a wound. Knowing how deeply I have buried my grief in the past, and the physical impact this can have, I was hugely grateful to find a fabulous book earlier this year, called Mourning Has Broken, by Carmella B'Hahn.

Carmella's book is a series of stories of bereavement and adversity, and how each individual overcame the impact of their experiences. I was particularly struck by Carmella's own story, which helped me to face the devastation of my Dad's death with some positivity. Each story gave me something new to reflect upon and helped me to feel part of the World community, accepting that loss and grief are parts of the human experience.

If you'd like to order a copy of her book, and hear more about her work, visit Carmella's website at http://www.solacealchemy.com/

The Drawingroom re-opens!

2008-10-31T07:21:00.001-07:00

Tomorrow, after a 3 week break, The Drawingroom in Chesham re-opens its doors to Chesham and its visitors. If you've never been to The Drawingroom, you're missing out. Art Café, Restaurant and Live Music Venue, it is an oasis of peace on weekdays for the best coffee for miles (all Fairtrade), and offers a variety of light bites and cosy meals as well as delicious locally made cakes. At weekends, the Restaurant is open for dining with friends or celebrating birthdays, christenings, weddings.

Get yourself on the mailing list and you'll hear about the Saturday night parties, the main focus for which is always some new and exciting live music from a variety of artists. Look out for Tinlin's album launch on 22nd November.

The Drawingroom is unique. Housed in a beautiful Tudor building in a cobbled courtyard, its walls are adorned with mostly figurative art from a variety of UK artists and there is a fabulous selection of stunning sculpture, not least the magical Serenity who stands at the front door.

You will also find an interesting mix of gifts from hand made designer jewellery, Indian singing bowels, Moroccan felt bags, hand painted spinning wheels and unusual wooden puzzles. You can also get your hands on locally made jams and chutneys, and honey, when the bees are being productive!

Richard is a passionate supporter of the local community and loves to welcome new arrivals as well as being a listening ear to regular visitors. Children love The Drawingroom, where they can dig out the books and colouring pads laid out for them while their parents relax.

It's quite simply a great place, and truly makes the best coffee. Come and have look for yourself, relax, enjoy, and maybe start your Christmas shopping! http://www.the-drawingroom.co.uk/

So long, Ceylon

2008-10-29T04:55:00.000-07:00

We waved goodbye to Sri Lanka 5 days ago now. What a truly beautiful country! The people, the landscape, the food, and the atmosphere of friendship and gentleness. Unless you're a Tamil Tiger, of course!

The Sri Lankan Buddhists have embraced the Hindu God Vishnu as their own, so all the beautiful Buddhist temples we visited also included an image of Vishnu, as well as their own god, Kataragama. I was suprised by the strong element of worship at all the temples, which is quite different from my understanding of Buddhism being a meditative faith, in fact more a way of life, where followers are encouraged to meditate on finding divine peace within their own hearts.

However, the Buddhist approach to all life was very evident. There was a real peacefulness and harmony in the way the people and animals share the same space, from the nonchalent ambling cows and the random roadside group of goats to the magnificent, celebrated elephants. The many scruffy, street-wise looking dogs lying in the road, were all carefully avoided by the weaving traffic of tuk tuks, cars and vans, and on one occasion our driver swerved slightly to avoid running over a scorpion! Such a difference from the frantic, fast-moving, enraged driving we're used to, and so much less stressful!! It even shows in the faces of the people, which are never more than a second away from a beaming smile.

After suffering from ulcerative colitis a few years ago, I regularly have problems with my stomach, but whilst in Sri Lanka I had no problems whatsoever, despite eating curry every day! It made the holiday so much more enjoyable, and it confirmed to me once again just how significant our mental and emotional well being is to our physical wellness. The absence of everyday pressures and anxieties combined with the general atmosphere of calm and giving were a far more powerful medicine than contained in any little white tablet. As Caroline Myss says in 'Anatomy of the Spirit', our biography creates our biology. I would highly recommend her book to anyone who is interested in addressing their own healing and good health from a holistic perspective, respecting each element of our being - mind, body and spirit. To me there is no deeper healing.

By the way, we booked our holiday through Travel Counsellors. PJ Van Zetten was tireless in finding us our last minute booking, and had the patience of Buddha himself as we examined our options. On our return journey, PJ checked us in online and we avoided the long queue at midnight, giving us time to meander round the airport shops and spend the last of our rupees. You can find PJ at http://travelcounsellors.co.uk/pj.vanzetten.

Off to the 'resplendent land'

2008-10-10T14:15:00.000-07:00

Just in case anyone reads my blog over the next couple of weeks, we're off to Sri Lanka, the 'resplendent land' for what we hope will be a magical holiday.

I hope to come back feeling spiritually enriched by the many Buddhas apparently dotting the landscape, and rested from enjoying some hot sunshine at last!

However, I have to say that I do love this time of year in England. Walking my dog, Taya, over the last couple of weeks I've seen some glorious views of the seasonal sunshine on autumn trees, red kites soaring over the fields, a fox darting through a hedge, morning mist floating over the River Chess, flying insects looking like frolicking fairies in the low rays of the late afternoon sun. I've even come across an elephant in a field... but I don't think that's a seasonal norm...

If anyone would like to post a comment, I look forward to receiving them when I'm back.

Take yourself out in the resplendent countryside while the sun is shining!

The Buddha inside all of us

2008-10-08T07:38:00.000-07:00

I hope it's not too corny to talk about the weather on a blog, but today is truly the most stunning autumn day, bright bright sunshine on golden leaves.
I spent a fascinating hour earlier today sitting in the warm sun outside The Drawingroom in Chesham (http://www.the-drawingroom.co.uk/), talking to a lovely guy who is a Zen monk and has just returned from living in Utah for several years. He talked about the philosophy of his particular teacher/monastery which has an inclusive belief that we are all Buddhas at source. Not that we must follow a life of isolation, meditation and committment to prayer in order to attain that enlightened state, but that we are born into the world with Buddha inside.

I like this idea, and believe that we can quite easily, if we are willing, tap into this feeling of contentment with ourselves, without judgement, just accepting ourselves and loving ourselves for who we are in all our completeness. With all our human characteristics and what we often regard as our 'failings', we are perfect, just as we are, just like Bridget Jones said!

The Power of Words

2008-10-08T07:24:00.000-07:00

I love quotes, and my favourite of the moment is this: "Deep within the human spirit, now largely severed from its ancient moorings, there is a search unfolding" John Welwood.

This is how I feel at the moment, a search for a new, more authentic way of working with my clients. I can feel it whirring away, making connections and creating a picture of the way forward. A mind map of tendrills, each with it's own special offering.

Every Coach is different, they each bring something unique to their practice, not just through professional experience, but their own life experiences, the values they hold and the beliefs they live by. When you're looking for a Coach, look for someone who inspires you, or with whom you feel some sort of connection.